Trump Cultist: “He’s kinda like Elvis”

Posted by on Sep 16, 2015 at 7:36 am

What we as a country really need to do is trade in one president with a creepy cult following for another. That would help restore our standing in the world. If only Donald Trump were like Elvis he wouldn’t be such a ubiquitous presence on television.

Billionaire Donald Trump stood beneath three towering 16-inch guns aboard a battleship in a show of political and military strength in advance of Wednesday night’s big GOP presidential debate – and said his competitors aren’t tough enough to take on our rivals.

“I’m fighting some very nice people — even though I’m leading in the polls,” Trump told a crowd of more than 500 aboard the decommissioned USS Iowa battleship.

Did you know he’s leading in the polls? He’s so shy and bashful we never heard him mention that before.

“We’re going to come out with some plans in a very short time. We’re going to be building up our military. We’re going to be making our military so big and so strong and so great,” Trump said.

He’s always got great plans, but never tells anyone what they are. But they’re going to be great, or something.

“It will be so powerful that I don’t think we’re ever going to have to use it. Nobody’s going to mess with us.”

Oh, OK. Well, it’s not as if there’s anything going on in the world which might necessitate military force.

“He’s kinda like Elvis,” said Patrick Duffy, a former longshoreman from San Pedro, speaking of Trump, who he came to see. “I never seen Elvis in person, but I should have. But this guy’s the same type of guy as that. He paints with a broad brush. He’s got smarts. He’s got balls.”

Does this guy realize Elvis has been dead for 38 years?

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