Finally, Some Good News: White House Not Screening Visitors for Ebola Virus

Posted by on Oct 08, 2014 at 1:29 pm

Relax, we’re joking. We understand there are some decent people working there, so…

The White House doesn’t have special precautions in place to screen individuals entering the executive mansion for Ebola, press secretary Josh Earnest said.

“We haven’t” implemented any special procedures, Earnest said during an interview with Bloomberg TV on Tuesday.

“The reason for that is that we know very clearly how people get Ebola,” Earnest elaborated. “It’s a little graphic — but the fact is the only way you can catch Ebola is if to come in direct contact with the bodily fluids of somebody who is showing the symptoms of Ebola.”

Meanwhile, no word yet whether Obama will interrupt his marathon fundraising schedule to arrange a state funeral for Ebola hero Thomas Duncan.

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One Response to “Finally, Some Good News: White House Not Screening Visitors for Ebola Virus”

  1. Comrade Kommissar Knows Best on 8/08/14 at 5:51 pm

    The One has an eye of Horus that can see if anyone is infected.
    He will keep them away from his area and ship them in buses to our area.
    His divine right of kings scepter will smite anyone who is infected that tries to get too close to the Messiah.