Shhh! The Evil Koch Brothers Have a Secret Bank or Something

Posted by on Sep 12, 2013 at 8:31 am

Politico calls them the “mysterious Koch brothers” because nobody has ever heard of them. Unless you’re a Democrat, as pretty much every missive from the DNC mentions them, almost pathologically. They’re the ultimate bogeymen and have been for several years. You see, people like George Soros can pump billions into Democrat causes,  but that’s OK. But these guys? They must be destroyed at any cost.

Heck, they’re so “mysterious” it’s a wonder how Politico found their photos to place prominently at the top of this latest hit piece.

An Arlington, Va.-based conservative group, whose existence until now was unknown to almost everyone in politics, raised and spent $250 million in 2012 to shape political and policy debate nationwide.

The group, Freedom Partners, and its president, Marc Short, serve as an outlet for the ideas and funds of the mysterious Koch brothers, cutting checks as large as $63 million to groups promoting conservative causes, according to an IRS document to be filed shortly.

The 38-page IRS filing amounts to the Rosetta Stone of the vast web of conservative groups — some prominent, some obscure — that spend time, money and resources to influence public debate, especially over Obamacare.

Oh no, a vast web! Why, there’s got to be something illegal here! Except, well, there isn’t.

The group has about 200 donors, each paying at least $100,000 in annual dues. It raised $256 million in the year after its creation in November 2011, the document shows. And it made grants of $236 million — meaning a totally unknown group was the largest sugar daddy for conservative groups in the last election, second in total spending only to Karl Rove’s American Crossroads and Crossroads GPS, which together spent about $300 million.

A totally unknown group. Except we know about it.

Short, a soft-spoken but ferociously conservative 43-year-old operative, provided us a draft of a forthcoming IRS filing that will soon be available to the public. Short, like most in the Koch empire, feels wealthy conservative activists such as Charles and David Koch get a bum rap from the media. So, Short wants to ease his groups and their cause out of the shadows.

Ferociously conservative? Is that better or worse than firebreathing conservative? Does anyone remember George Soros being called ferociously liberal? Yeah, neither do we. He’s just a mere philanthropist funding every far-left group under the sun.

Democrats have their own vast web of secretive funders — and Short is right: Few liberals got as much scrutiny as the Koch brothers over the past few years.

Oh really? So where are the stories in Politico about the vast web of secret Democrat sugar daddies? You think that would be a signal to these clowns to maybe look into them.

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6 Responses to “Shhh! The Evil Koch Brothers Have a Secret Bank or Something”

  1. Chicago Vota on 12/12/13 at 10:46 am

    I don’t seem to remember the Koch brothers collaborating with the Nazi’s either. I guess George Soros can be forgiven for anything.

  2. Tim on 12/12/13 at 11:16 am

    “Few liberals got as much scrutiny as the Koch brothers over the past few years.”

    How do you scrutinize someone you never heard of?

  3. theBuckWheat on 12/12/13 at 11:20 am

    Vast web indeed. Liberals (er, “progressives”) have honed the idea of a web to an art form. They commonly co-credential each other: Liberal Group A gives flashy award to Liberal Group B, who along with Liberal Group C gives award to Liberal Group D, who gives award six months later to Liberal Group A. These all must be people we must listen to, just look at all the awards they have earned!

    for a vast web, see:

  4. Harun on 12/12/13 at 11:39 am

    I actually read a book by one of the Koch brothers a few years ago without realizing who wrote it.

    Basically, they are industrialists, who run businesses who employ a lot of hard-working people in America. You’d think lefties would appreciate that instead of some of their American donors who manufacture in foreign countries (see Silicon Valley.)

    Secondly, a major theme of their book and of their business philosophy is COMPLIANCE.

    In other words, they work hard to comply with government regulations. You’d think that would also win kudos from the left.


  5. Hawk on 12/12/13 at 1:26 pm

    As far as the liberals in the media are concerned, the Koch brothers are a hollowed out mountain fortress away from being super-villains from a James Bond movie.

    Oh, the Koch brothers really do have a hollowed out mountain fortress. They also have a death ray that only kills minorities.

    I read that in the Daily Kos I think…