Flufftastic: AP Reveals Five ‘New’ Things About Obama

Posted by on Dec 02, 2013 at 7:39 am

What sort of fresh hell is this? This nonsense passes for news? A president who’s never had a more slavish devotion from the media actually has some things we don’t know about him? Let’s see:


Obama showed off his pipes when he sang the opening lines of the Al Green classic “Let’s Stay Together” at a New York fundraiser in January 2012. He apparently has had a lot of practice. Asked during an interview on BET’s “106 & Park” about her husband’s unexpected turn as a balladeer, Michelle Obama said he sings “all the time. Oh, yes, he’s in the bathroom all the time just singing. He is always willing to sing. He’s like, ‘You want me to sing now, want me to sing something for you?'”

So this isn’t new, but it’s supposed to be new?


Obama said the mothers of the Pakistani roommates he had in college in 1980 taught him how to cook a traditional South Asian meat dish called keema, a lentil dish known as daal “and other very good Pakistani food.” (He studied at Occidental College in Los Angeles from 1979-81.) Sam Kass, the chef Obama brought with him from Chicago to cook meals for the first family, didn’t sound too worried about his pots and pans in the president’s hands. “If he wants to make dinner now and again, that’s fine by me,” Kass said in an interview.

How about we hear from these Pakistani guys? You know what would also be new? If we found someone who knew him at Columbia and what his grades were.

They also tell us he allegedly broke his nose playing basketball, is a world traveler and one of his daughters has a peanut allergy. Really hard hitting stuff there, AP.

Here are some other groundbreaking things about Obama.

1) He’s incompetent.

2) He’s a raging narcissist.

3) He can’t speak extemporaneously without a TelePrompter.

4) His healthcare website still doesn’t work.

5) The media’s still in his back pocket.

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3 Responses to “Flufftastic: AP Reveals Five ‘New’ Things About Obama”

  1. red speck on 2/02/13 at 11:37 am

    And he is expert at converting O2 to CO2 through his gaping maw. Congratulations, America! You elected a real winner… twice.