If the Boston bombers were “right wing extremists” would we be hearing about what great guys they were? I doubt it. But nine days after the Boston terror attacks we’re inundated with these schmaltzy puff pieces on what an awesome guy this killer was. Enough already. He’s a fucking monster who dropped a bomb right behind an eight-year-old boy. We don’t give a shit if he washed the feet of nuns in his spare time. He’s a goddamn killer.
If Dzhokhar Tsarnaev is responsible for setting off pressure-cooker bombs at the Boston Marathon, as authorities allege, he displayed a remarkable poker face at his college campus in southeastern Massachusetts.
The 19-year-old sophomore studied engineering, played soccer and became known for party-hopping and smoking marijuana. When he talked to his friends, it was usually about one subject — girls. As a freshman, he decorated his dorm room wall with two posters: one of Einstein, the other of 12 bikini-clad women on a beach.
“He would talk about which ones had the nicest butt,” said Mary Pariseau, a friend who lived on the same floor.
On a Twitter account that Pariseau confirmed as Tsarnaev’s, he sounds more frat boy than fundamentalist. He quoted Eminem lyrics, cracked jokes and proclaimed his love for peanut butter, Marshmallow Fluff and Nutella.
“Not being able to find the remote to the tv is probably one of the most reoccurring struggles of life,” one tweet said.
Now classmates at the University of Massachusetts Dartmouth are trying to reconcile their good-looking, fun-loving friend with the serious-looking man in the backward white ball cap and gray hoodie in a surveillance video image branded by the FBI as suspect No. 2. Investigators are essentially doing the same.
Naturally some of these pinheads just can’t cope with reality.
“A lot of us are very confused on campus since we were such good friends with him and all of the sudden he’s mixed up in these horrible things,” she said. “I don’t believe it even though the facts are right in front of me.
“He was just normal. That’s why it’s so unbelievable that it happened and why a lot of us at UMass think he didn’t want to do it but was influenced by his brother or his uncle or whoever. It’s so not him.”
Sorry to burst your bubble, but it’s him, you idiot.