Yes, this is an actually story from Good Morning America.
Florence Williams gets right to the bosom of her new book in its first line, reeling off names for the most beloved part of the female anatomy: “Funbags. Boobsters. Chumawumbas. Dingle bobbers. Dairy pillows. Jellybonkers. Nim nums.”
So begins William’s humorous, but deadly serious treatise, “Breasts: A Natural and Unnatural History.”
“We love breasts, yet we can’t quite take them seriously,” she writes. “We name them affectionately, but with a hint of insult. Breasts embarrass us. They’re unpredictable. They’re goofy. They can turn both babies and grown men into lunkheads.”
Breasts feed us, nurture us and excite us. But the most versatile organ in the female body can also kill us. They are made up of fat and estrogen receptors — so they “soak up pollution like a pair of soft sponges,” she writes.
One in eight women will have breast cancer in her lifetime.
Williams, an award-winning science writer, investigates why breasts are assaulted equally by men and a rising number of chemicals in the environment.
She follows breasts through their natural life cycle from puberty to changes during pregnancy, breastfeeding and menopause. And she wonders about their psycho-sexual meaning, writing, “big breasts get a lot of attention.”
Gee, ya think?