
Finally, a silver lining in the dark cloud of last week’s election returns.
John “Liveshot” Kerry is in the running to become secretary of defense, which means he wouldn’t be a senator from Massachusetts anymore.
Please God, let it happen. How can we miss him when he won’t go away?
Twenty-eight years in the Senate, and name me one thing he’s done. Go ahead, take your time, and by the way, marrying gold digger Mama T doesn’t count.
Nobody has ever denied that when it comes to his trade — gigolo — John Forbes Kerry is one of the all-time greats. He’s in the Gigolo Hall of Fame. See, a really good gigolo might snag one heiress in a lifetime with a nine-figure trust fund. Kerry has married two. When it comes to gigolos, he’s Steve Jobs.

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